Pregnancy as an athlete - an honest review

I love being an athlete. I define myself by my performance and dedication. 

Last summer, I GAVE IT MY ALL. My nutrition was 100% and my training was going amazing. I knew we wanted kids in the near future, and as a very mission oriented person, I promised myself I would be the strongest, and healthiest, I have ever been prior to bearing a child.

It worked. I had hit my goal at the time. I felt lean, I felt unstoppable- I felt really, really strong. 

Was I a little extreme, yes. Did I begin to "fear" falling off my nutrition plan, yes (I can do another blog post on body image if you are interested). Did I need to give my body a break, yes. I am so black and white sometimes that I need to remember there is a healthy gray area too (I am working on it). Anyway, Fast forward to November 2019 - and BOY did my body get a wake-up-call. 

Everything I knew went out the window during the first trimester. I never got "sick" but felt SO tired, and SO queasy. Proudly enough, I made it to the gym for nearly every scheduled workout (except twice). I just felt so much better after being active. However, my diet was driving me insane. Not having control over what I was fueling my body with was so frustrating, you have NO IDEA. My diet backed by science went to- who the heck knows. I didn't bother measuring my food anymore because honestly, there wasn't much I could stomach anyway. Every food I knew and loved was GROSS especially protein, YUCK.  

I don't know if it was the uptick of carbohydrates or progesterone, but body image during trimester 1 and the beginning of two was in the toilet (insert frequent shower sobbing here). My stomach was soft, arms and legs swollen, just really bloated. I know most women say that pre-bump its just BLOAT CITY, but I don't like to compare myself to others. What I saw, and what I felt, was not a proper representation of who I am, it was like being a stranger in my own body. 

Like clockwork though, As soon as I had hit 12/13 weeks my appetite went back to NORMAL! I was back to my regular scheduled nutrition plan with the required addition of calories and I felt AMAZING. My workouts were satisfying both my body and MIND. I am SO grateful to have been able to continue CrossFit thus far, you have NO IDEA. Without it, I don't even know where I'd be. Granted sometimes I push myself maybeeee a teeennnyyy bit too far- I am learning to slow my roll. 

Interestingly enough, as my belly has become more prominent, I have felt more comfortable in my own skin. The swelling has subsided (for now) my clothes actually feel less tight in my arms and legs going into week 27, then earlier months (with the exception of my stomach of course). 

Do I love being pregnant? Am I one of those women who prefer to have a bump then not? NOPE. Can you feel that way and still be incredibly grateful- YES! I feel SO lucky to be able to carry this little girl into the world. I eat, sleep, and keep active for her (okay, okay, and still a little for me too). I know that by feeding her the most nutrient dense foods, she will not only grow beautifully now, but also into adulthood. People have questioned my attitude towards pregnancy and nutrition, and why I am not eating ice cream, cake, pizza, etc. I don't feel that pregnancy is an excuse to eat things you normally wouldn't. Those foods don't make me happy (except for on occasion) and they don't make me feel good (mentally or physically). Your body goes through A LOT during pregnancy, and fueling it with what it likes isn't a negative in my opinion. 

May 15th marks the beginning of trimester 3. I have so many mixed feelings. I am not necessarily afraid of getting bigger anymore, or scaling more workouts. I just want to feel the best I can possibly feel going into labor. The weight will come off, my abdominal wall will still be there (that last one, I have to keep telling myself). I just know that come August 7th- or close to it- we will have met our little girl, and we can begin a new journey together.